12 — THE CITIZEN, Prince George — Friday, February 19, 1982
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answered the phone once wearing only a hair dryer and I thought I heard a giggle, but I couldn't be sure.
  That’s why I was interested to read a story about dogs whose masters were into running. You see ’em all over the place... joggers Happing along, five, ten miles a day and beside them a ball of fur on a leash panting to keep up.
  How do they know dogs enjoy running? Isn’t it possible some dogs are born who don’t like to chase cars, return sticks or bite mailmen? Maybe they just didn’t know how to tell you.
  Ironically, vets say dogs develop the
same problems as runners: sore feet, shin splints, heat prostration, lacerated foot pads, arthritic hip conditions and heart problems. They even suffer from attacks from other dogs. Besides that, dogs don’t sweat like people. (Did you ever see a deodorant for dogs?)
 I watched a marathon once at San Diego where a runner came in with his dog on the leash. Both had gone over 26 miles of a gruelling course. Both had hit the wall. Both had drawn from their reserves for every bit of energy they possessed to keep their bodies moving.
  The one in the shorts with two legs got a
T-shirt and a can of beer. The one in the fur coat with four legs wandered around confused with a tree wish.
 There must be a way for non-running dogs to let you know if t hey want to run or not. Luckily, we have a dog that communicates. If you say to him. “C’mon, boy, we’re going running!” he crawls under the dryer with a Marguerita and looks at you with a disgusted look that says, “I’m not moving until you call a cab."
 He could be the smartest dog in the world. Or he could have picked up that trick from me.
AT WIT'S END
Erma Bombeck
  I’ve heard Marlin Perkins tell when an alligator is “bored,” William Conrad describe an elephant plowing through an entire village as “playful” and Lome Greene diagnose a penguin who won’t go into the water as “crabby and sluggish."
  I don’t know how they do it. I’m probably the only person in the world who can’t tell when a dog is smiling. I
  After years of being married to a man who sits around ail day Sunday and watches animal documentaries, I have gotten used to people giving animals human emotions.
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