Page
04
Sex
workshops
help
women
gain
confidence
and
learn
technique
Source:
The
Link
(Concordia
University)
By
Rina
Calabrese
MONTREAL
(CUP)
-
We
all
sat
around
in
a
circle,
nervous,
tense,
hesitantly
waiting
for
the
Sex
Toys
101
workshop
to
get
underway.
Except
for
one
woman,
we
were
all
sex
toy
virgins.
All
our
eyes
were
transfixed
on
Carlyle
Jansen,
ouf
facilitator.
Jansen
is
the
owner
of
Good
For
Her,
a
sex
shop
based
in
Toronto.
A
large
plastic
box
sat
at
her
feet
holding
untold
apparatuses
of
pleasure.
After
a
quick
introduction
in
which
Jansen
explained
that
one
of
the
reasons
she
got
into
this
field
was
because
she
was
unable
to
orgasm
until
age
26,
she
asked
us
each
to
explain
why
we
were
there.
"Without
getting
too
deep,
too
quickly,"
said
one
woman
with
impressive
candor,
"I'm
27,
and
I
have
never
experienced
an
orgasm."
Another
woman
easily
confessed,
"I
love
playing
with
sex
toys
and
I
thought
I'd
come
see
if
you
had
anything
I
haven't
seen
before."
I,
of
course,
had
the
perfect
excuse;
I
was
profiling
Jansen.
Dipping
into
the
large
plastic
box,
Jansen
brought
out
an
assortment
of
vibrators
and
djldos.
Explaining
what
each
one
does,
she
then
passed
them
around
and
we
each
got
to
feel
the
vibrations
for
ourselves.
The
vibrators
each
had
their
own
special
name:
Blue
Gigolo,
Red
.Dolphin,
Blue
Mini
Massager
with
Rabbit
Ears,
Nexus
and
Clear
Bump
and
Grind.
"This
one
is
made
from
a
new
material
called
cyber
skin,"
said
Jansen,
holding
up
an
incredibly
life-like
looking
vibrator.
It
felt
creepily
like
real
skin
as
I
squished
it
in
the
palm
of
my
hand.
The
purpose
of
the
workshop
was
to
familiarize
women
with
sex
toys
so
they
don't
feel
so
inhibited
when
they
go
into
sex
shops.
Most
women
who've
never
tried
a
vibrator
don't
know
what
type
will
work
best
for
them
and
they're
too
embarrassed
to
ask
the
salesperson
any
questions,
so
they
might
end
up
choosing
the
wrong
one.
And
for
many
women
who
are
non-orgasmic,
a
vibrator
is
often
the
first
(and
perhaps
only)
way
for
them
to
reach
orgasm.
So
choosing
the
right
one
is
incredibly
important.
Rabbit
Ears
or
no
Rabbit
Ears
could
make
all
the
difference.
'
Jansen
herself
got
interested
in
sex
toys
because
she
was
non-orgasmic
and
it
was
a
vibrator
that
brought
her
to
orgasm
for
the
first
time.
"There's
a
lot
of
shame
out
there
around
using
sex
toys,"
she
says.
'There's
a
lot
of
shame
around
non-orgasmic
women
being
able
to
orgasm
from
vibrators
alone.
So
what
I
wanted
to
do
was
help
women
feel
that
it's
okay
if
they
don't
orgasm,
that
they
can
try
a
vibrator
and
see
if
that
gets
them
there
and
to
use
the
right
kind
of
one,
not
just
a
small
teeny
one
that
doesn't
have
power
because
you're
afraid
to
use
something
big
and
then
all
of
sudden
that's
not
what's
going
to
work."
So
why
does
a
vibrator
often
work
when
all
else
fails?
Power,
says
Jansen.
'There's
some
of
us
who
are
what
I
call
hardwired.
We
just
need
a
lot
of
stimulation
and
then
to
boot
those
of
us
who
didn't
naturally
discover
orgasm
at
age
12
or
15,
the
older
we
get
the
more
we're
like
'okay
am
I
getting
there,
am
I
doing
it
right?'
We're
thinking
about
it
so
much
that
even
though
it
might
under
normal
circumstances
be
the
right
amount
of
pressure
we're
so
caught
up
in
our
heads
and
we
can't
relax
so
that
there's
no
way
we're
going
over
the
top."
A
vibrator
has
so
much
power,
she
says,
that
you
feel
that
if
it's
strong
enough
it
just
forces
you
to
have
an
orgasm.
"So
the
more
you
do
it
the
more
it's
like
'oh,
okay'"
she
says.
"But
it's
a
journey.
Sometimes
it
takes
practice
and
sometimes
it's
just
a
matter
of
your
body
learning
how
to
do
it.
It's
like
learning
to
walk,
after
a
while
your
body
knows
how
to
go
from
one
step
to
the
next
and
you
don't
have
to
think
about
it,
it
just
happens.
It
just
takes
some
of
us
a
while
to
get
there."
Sometimes,
reveals
Jansen,
she
is
approached
by
the
non-orgasmic
to
personally
help
them
reach
orgasm.
"I
have
some
clients
that
I
work
with
who
are
non-orgasmic,"
she
says.
"They've
tried
everything,
they've
seen
sex
therapists,
they've
gone
through
all
the
books."
Jansen,
who
has
been
conducting
workshops
for
four
years
now,
says
that
the
major
obstacles
women
face
are
that
they
don't
know
how
to
have
an
orgasm;
they
don't
know
where
their
g-spot
is;
they
don't
know
how
to
orgasm
from
penetration;
they
don't
know
what
ejaculation
is;
and,
they
generally
don't
know
their
own
bodies.
"A
lot
of
it
is
about
confidence,
a
lot
of
it
is
about
technique
so
that
they
know
how
to
do
it
properly
so
they
can
feel
more
confident,"
she
says.
Jansen
admits
she
feels
much
more
confident
as
a
lover
if
she
has
some
techniques
under
her
belt,
so
to
speak.
Her
biggest
fear
is
that
she'll
be
trying
to
turn
someone
on
and
end
up
looking
stupid,
so
the
knowledge
of
technique
gives
her
power
and
confidence.
Self-image
also
plays
a
huge
part,
she
says.
Our
society
is
inundated
with
images
of
the
perfect
body
and
women
invest
huge
amounts
of
energy
and
money
into
trying
to
conform
to
that
ideal.
There's
also
a
certain
image
that's
portrayed
in
a
lot
of
pornography
videos,
contends
Jansen,
where
women
are
there
for
men's
sexual
satisfaction.
"If
you
compare
how
long
the
men
are
performing
oral
sex
on
the
women
versus
how
long
the
women
are
performing
oral
sex
on
the
men,
there's
a
vast
difference,"
she
says.
"The
guys
go
down
on
the
women
for
30
seconds
and
then
the
women
are
on
the
guys
for
10
minutes.
I
think
that
to
a
certain
extent
men
get
a
twisted
image
as
to
what
Resonations:
Hip-Hop
1
Schmip-Hop
Divine
Cucurbita
by
Chris
H.
b
jeJ'"
wr-
firm
"
.
gives
women
pleasure
through
that
and
through
other
very
subtle
images
that
happen
in
advertising
and
in
the
media."
Women
who
walk
into
her
store
are
surrounded
by
images
of
all
types
of
women,
"not
just
skinny
young
white
ones
who
are
generally
those
who
are
portrayed
as
the
only
ones
who
are
sexy."
This
makes
her
customers
feel
that
they
too
can
be
sexy
and
it
makes
a
huge
difference
in
increasing
their
confidence
in
other
areas
of
their
lives
because
their
sexual
confidence
affects
their
overall
self-esteem.
"It's
not
just
that
sexuality
is
the
key
to
feeling
confident
in
all
areas
of
our
lives,"
says
Jansen,
"but
it's
one
of
those
keys
that
can
potentially,
affect
other
aspects
of
how
we
feel
about
ourselves."
'
''vjwrjj
The
CNC
Free
Press
March
2000
As
courtesy
to
students,
Lois
Nelson
will
be
helping
any!
interested
students
with
3
their
taxes
on
March
23rd,24th,
I
30th
and
31
st
across
from
the
cafeteria.1
Please
bring
all
relevant
data.
It
should
be
noted
that
these
are
but
the
mere
opinions
of
a
mortal
man
and
not
necessarily
the
gospel
gospel
truths.
Interpretation
resides
in
the
ear
of
the
listener.
1
1
Mathematik
-
Ecology
(eo:mj)
This
is
Canadian
hip-hop
and
is
atiice
change
of
pace
from
the
garbage
that
is
predominantly
popular
in
this
genre
right
now.
The
beats
are
underground
and
perfect
for
those
midafternoon
mornings
where
all
you
can
think
about
is
how
badyoin
head
hurts.It's
also
a
perfect
afterglow
cd,
if
that
makes
any
sense!
It's
great
to
listen
to
bathing
in
moonlight,
smoking
a
whatever,
contemplating
cities,
photons
and
horizons.
Worth
checking
out
if
you
like
hip-hop
but
are
sick
of
greed
rap.
1
MC
Face
-
Not
the
Green
Tom
Show
(eo:mj)
Finally
a
collaboration
between
MC
Face
(who
needs
no
introduction)
and
producerjom
Green.
It's
apparent
from
track
1
(of
26)
that
Face
is
not
a
Green
fan.
but
perhaps
it's
thi
;
friction
between
the
two
that
creates
such
an
excellent
cd.
It's
a
hip-hop
cd
that
doesn't
sound
unlike
Young
MC
or
De
La
Soul
but
on
acid
of
course.
It's
catchy
as
hell
"and
unfortunately
that
can
be
a
bad
thing.
"And
just
like
Doomwe
make
the
heads
go
boomI
got
seal
carcasses
all
over
my
room"
doesn't
exactly
go
over
fabulously
in
line
at
Overwaitea.
It's
nothing
but
schizophrenic
fun
and
something
you
should
definetely
hunt
down
if
your
a
Tom
Green
fan.
I
Ghostface
Killah
-
Supreme
Clientele
(eo:mj)
The
latest
from
the
Wu
camp
and
probably
the
best
thing
to
come
out
from
them
in
a
long
time.
With
RZA
and
Ghost
executive
producing
the
sound
is
reminiscent
to
older
Wu,
all
the
way
back
to
36
Chambers.
Nearly
every
original
member
makes
an
appearance.
In
the
realm
of
commercial
rap
this
is
the
alternative.
It's
either
this,
redone
dead
disco,
or
cash
money
groans.
I
recommend
this:
Now
a
lot
of
you
are
thinking;
lot's
o'
hip-hop
white
guy
(me)
pretty
fly
honky.
It's
no
like
that
though.
I'm
not
trying
to
find
my
identity
ornicheor
anything.
Instead,
I
like
music
and
this
music
is
good
for
a
soul
like
mine.
The
beats
soothe,
no
matter
how
hardcore.
Cerebral
stimulation,
not
image
imitation.
Na'mean?
The
Smashing
Pumpkins
-
MACHINAthe
machines
of
God
(eo:mj)
1
At
first
this
cd
did
nothing
for
me
but
now
I
think
I'm
hearing
a
bigger
picture
(after
about
10
listens).
While
this
isn't
the
thrash-fest
some
moron's
were
expecting
there
is
more
to
it
than
meets
the
ear
orTthe
first
couple
of
spins.
Then
again,
what's
something
like
that
worth
these
days?
If
it
doesn't
satisfy1that3
minute
pop
sensation
on
it's
first
impression
then
it's
in
the
used
section
10
minutes
after
it's
release
and
lost
from
mass
consciousness
forever.
Curse
our
short
ass
attention
spans.
Media
be
damned.
What
was
I
talking
about?
Can't
find
these,
recommendations,
Email
me
at:
hoghccnc.bc.ca
1