I
MEMBER
2003
Arts
and
Entertainment
Free
Forum
1
1
ajor
concert
offers
major
mid-semester
fun
deejay
Ice
Dawg
lit
would
take
a
y
wretched
pessimist
to
greet
iews
of
the
first-ever
88.7
R
handSHAKER,
on
smber
14th,
with
anything
ive!
it's
see
if
you,
dear
reader,
'wretched
pessimist,
lie
news:
In
late
October,
Prince
George's
only
nunity
radio
station,
meed
it
has
signed
on
as
the
irsponsor
for
the
CFUR
JHAKER
-
a
concert
featur-jhe
city's
premiere
local
"designed
to
bring
the
stu-populations
of
CNC
and
IC
together
for
a
boogie-i,
fly-in-the-face-of-scholas-
ammer
pimply
Susan
e
tirst
thing
I
went
len
my
boyfriend
of
one
uddenly
started
moving
as
the
hammer.
I
had
to
it
I
had
lost
a
total
of
12
ners
to
husbands,
mends,
lovers,
roommates,
as,
and
even
male
chil-
Every
time
a
male
moved
pe
hammer
went
with
him.
1
to
buy
a
new
one.
So
tit.
I
heard
him
downstairs
I
away
the
TV,
the
VCR,
ideos,
but
I
had
the
ham-
I
heard
him
packing
the
B,Tthe
cutlery,
the
china,
es,
but
I
had
the
ham-
heard
the
cherry
wall
let
leave,
I
heard
the
rdresser
go,
I
heard
the
yerpack
up
and
tune
out
Lou
Bega,
I
can't
i
anymore,
sorry
Ricky,
ore
banging
for
a
while,
hania,
I
feel
like
a
woman
jause,
I
still
have
the
ham-
LAnd
so
it
happened,
the
Icame
"when
all
of
his
i
were
finally
out
of
the
e,but
just
before
I
said
bye,
the
dreaded
question,
is
the
hammer?"
My
raced,
giving
him
the
ter
would
mean
13
ham-
lost,
unlucky,
so
I
opted
:
safest
response,
"I
don't
P
After
all,
it's
way
easier
gumb
than
smart,
and,
1
ave
the
hammer.
As
for
yfriend,
good-bye!
ft
tics
evening
of
topdog
entertainment
and
sheep-hooves-in-your-rubber
boots
debauchery.
Floored,
Opus
Dei,
We
Killed
Him,
Veritas,
Downtown
Dave
Routley,
even
the
majestic,
illustrious
and
extravagantly
talented
Raghu
Lokanathan
will
take
to
the
stage
to
form
arguably
the
most
solid
and
diverse
core
of
local
artists
ever
to
share
a
marquee
in
Prince
George.
Tickets
are
an
inconsequential
seven
bucks,
but
they
won't
be
sold
at
the
door,
and
they
do
seem
to
be
disappearing
faster
than
American
soldiers
in
Baghdad.
So
pick
yours
up
ASAP
if
you
don't
wan
t
to
suffer
the
ignominy
of
lying
to
your
friends
when
they
ask:
'Say,
To:
aP
(insert
name
here),
were
you
at
the
handSHAKER
last
night?'
It
certainly
promises
to
be
a
momentous
evening
in
the
admittedly
tragic
and
ridiculous
saga
of
Prince
George
cultural
happenings.
So
momentous,
in
fact,
that
Pacific
Western
Transportation
is
donating
a
bus
to
ensure
UNBC
rez
students
receive
safe
shuttle
to
and
from
the
event.
Devan
Joneson,
a
human
being
who
will
not,
under
any
circumstances,
be
driving
this
bus,
states
that
"the
handSHAKER
may
have
the
most
foolish
name
of
any
concert
event
I've
ever
heard
of
in
my
entire
life,
but
it's
the
first
time
this
city
has
done
anything
to
bring
the
student
populations
of
UNBC
and
:-"'
CNC
together.
It's
about
friggin'
time."
Arguably
the
most
solid
and
diverse
core
of
local
artists
ever
to
share
a
marquee
in
Prince
George.
The
handSHAKER
takes
place
at
St.
Michael's
Church
Hall
on
5th
and
Victoria.
Do
not,
however,
let
the
event's
proximity
to
Christ
fool
you
into
thinking
it
will
be
anything
but
a
devilishly
good
time.
For
though
no
Eucharistic
wine
(long
purported
to
be
the
very
lifeblood
of
the
Christian
Saviour)
will
be
served,
there
will
be
plenty
of
cold
beer
and
'evil'
rock
n'
roll
music
to
Grabbing
you
by
the
hand
and
leading
you
away
from
me
;'
.;.'
The
beauty
that
once
was,
has
slipped
away
into
the
void
of
what
is
you
can
have
out
now.
Static
hair,
eyes
dilated
wearing
a
smirk
your
stunningly
haunting...
though
I
wonder
how
much
of
this
you
really
are
taking
in...
Why
can't
you
see
that
she's
tapping
her
foot
counting
the
seconds
that
are
going
by,
before
you
kiss
her?
Why
must
I
subject
myself
once
more
as
a
specimen?
...your
apparently
a
willing
hostage
and
I
a
willing
captor...
this
day
will
end
like
every
other
I
will
gaze
around
the
room
then
get
up
and
leave
asking
to
use
the
worm
hole
There
will
be
no
parallel
universe
for
me
I
laugh
to
myself
thinking
that
I
could
have
said
weirder
realizing
'ignorance
is
bliss'
I
escape
escapsim
momentarily
and
follow
the
yellow
brick
road
back
to
reality.
X!.;A
iadyi-Jki
a
flower
antiftce
all
fiowe-fare'beaatifefBll
tf
Jadiestare"
butlM.'
thsw
are
;
what
makes
the"
world
beauftfall
eauttfttl5fBeautfu4
mmm
are
tfcfetgi
tbSt
make
life
worth
Jivtag
-
J
-
witykthem
eWvwoaId
'
aol
Ofetand
Mankind
.woaldnot3
Revolve
JOOToHd:wold
be'Vmpteand"
tnefe,-.woail
fee
Wsadir
J
Fortitude
Simply
Susan
The
blackbird
perches
proudly,
on
top
of
the
old
White
spruce,
its
aura,
radiating
a
soft,
yellow-orange
glow,
like
a
ring
of
fire.
Fire,
hot,
dangerous,
to
be
respected,
like
the
blackbird
with
the
patience,
like
the
spruce
with
the
wisdom,
like
the
aura
with
the
hope,
bringing
peace,
full
circle,
around,
And
again,
the
blackbird
perches
proudly.
corrupt
and
gratify
your
everlasting
soul.
Doors
open
at
7:30pm,
but
the
thing
goes
on
until
the
glorious
wee
hours
of
the
morning.
There,
dear
reader,
consider
yourself
informed.
Now,
ask
yourself
if
you
have
greeted
the
above
revelation
with
anything
but
love.
If
the
answer
to
this
introspective
enquiry
is
'Yes,'
then,
sadly,
it
means
you
are
a
wretched
pessimist.
That's
the
bad
news.
The
good
news
is
that
even
wretched
pessimists
are
welcome
at
the
CFUR
handSHAKER.
So,
pessimists
and
optimists
alike,
stop
by
the
CNC
Student
Association
office
and
pick
up
your
tickets.
Hope
to
see
you
there!